Tuesday, June 4, 2013

What is a Cameroonian artist worth?



I recently found myself ‘feuding’ with a brother who happens to be an artist. He posted this comment 'I guess someone has whispered to Ivorian artists that Cameroon is their No. 1 music consumers out of Ivory Coast. This evening Serge Bernaude was on CRTV 7.30 News announcing his show on the 31ST of this month in Yaounde. What a pity for Cameroonian artists!' I initially replied with this comment ' ....come on bro, It is ur fault Cameroonian artists. Ur all too heady and narrow-minded.' He accused me of using negative words and drew this second comment from me ' Come on bro,I get the impression u feel slighted by my words.I am sorry but that was never my intention. It is an honest and fair comment I stand by. Let me explain. I find Cameroonian artists generally narrow minded because you guys seem to refuse to realise that with globalisation there are no more frontiers and u must compete with music from far and near. When you feel you are losing out to foreign artists you try to strum our patriotic strings forgetting that just as our boxer matches must compete with blue=headed matches from Pakistan you too must compete with Fally and DJ Arafat made music. So instead of complaining you guys should get in2 ur studios and start making competitive music. Once again apologies if I came off as slightful, that wasn't my intent. Pyz.' This virtual conversation prompted this post.
                              There is a background to the current grudge Cameroonian artists have with music from without Cameroon and the Cameroonian music consuming public. Street legend has it that while foreign stars like Sean Paul , Akon and most  recently P-Square, I think, were paid around a 1,000,000 CFAF to come perform in Cameroon, Cameroonian artists enlisted to serve as opening acts got a 100,000 CFAF. Remember I said street legend and not official sources holds these figures to be true. Whatever the case, press reports suggest that a wave of discontent gripped the Cameroonian music scene when P-Square came to Cameroon. This suggestion and the feudy exchange I had on social media left me with one question, generally – speaking what are Cameroonian artists worth? By Cameroonian artists I mean those operating on the local music scene. This means the so-called diapora – based artists are excluded as well as Petit – Pays because he is an EXCEPTION. So what is an average Cameroonian artist worth? I would have loved to use the name of an actual artist but that might come off as disrespectful and that’s not my intention. So I’ll just proceed generally. What do I mean by what is a Cameroonian artist worth? If it is announced that the average Cameroonian artist is headlining a show, how many people will show up? How many will show and be ready to pay a 1000 CFAF for the entry ticket so that concert promoter can pay the artist let's say 5,000,000 CFAF for the show and still make a profit when all is said and done? Remember in the word showbiz, business is the end of everything. How many Cameroonian artists can headline a show and take a crowd hostage with a 2 hour slew of hits punctuated with brilliant choreography and stuff? This is what I mean by what is the average Cameroonian artist worth? Personally I think he/she isn’t worth much, not much at all.
                               So whose fault is it that Cameroonian artists aren’t worth much? Is it the government’s? No, not fundamentally. We are in a free-market economy where the forces of demand and supply, and not government, determine the value or WORTH of things. We also live in the 21st century where you don’t need the latest - gadgeted studio to craft a hit. Is it the fault of the private sector sponsors then? Once again no, not fundamentally. As unfortunate as it may be, we live in profit - minded world where most companies will dole out one hundred million of any currency only when they’re sure to get a return on investment. So is it the fault of the Cameroonian music-consuming public that their unenthusiastic consumption of local music has floored the worth of their home-bred talent? No, not fundamentally. In a globalised world, people have a right to gravitate towards what pleases them and if you want to drag their attention youwards you better please them. So is it the fault of the artists? I hate to say this but YES, it is their fault mainly. The average Cameroonian artist still lives with the illusion that the Cameroonian music - consuming public owes them the patriotic favour of supporting them.NO, HELL NO. They also forget that music in the 21st century is a product and entertainment is an industry. So just as our boxer matches must compete with blue-tip matches from Pakistan so too must their products compete with those from other countries. Duc – Z’s ‘African mamy’ isn’t at the top of the charts because it is Cameroonian. It is because it is simply good.
                             Less I forget, doesn’t it strike you as odd that in our entertainment parlance, those doing music are still referred to as artists and musicians instead of stars, performers and entertainers? This is perception and this not the fault of government, private sector sponsors or the public. Our artists don’t brand themselves as 100,000,000 CFAF acts. While other artists perform ours still only sing. While other artists entertain, ours still only dance. In the face of an entertainer, musicians aren’t worth much. Feel free to think otherwise.

Monday, June 3, 2013

Eto'o dong win mousanga for Russia


















Even though yee wish dee die when e day with Lion dem, Eto'o na oga for Russia. Yesterday e win award for best ndambaman for Russian league. They gee yee the musanga na yesterday as yee team be dee pop champagne for da niang niang stade. Wo jos hope say when e kam Cameroon, make e helep we win someting, even if na jos qualification for World Cup for Brazil. 

A dong die! Charlotte Dipanda dong enter nyuoungoh

The other day some ma friend be wan take some music dem for ma machine. As me and yee begin look inside ma music folder, a ask yee wheda e wan Charlotte Dipanda. Na yee way the ngah say well since way all man like Charlotte Dipanda make  a jos gee yee. As a dee send yee dee folder, e make some statement way a no fit member fine. But thing way e tok be mean say the girl trong becos say e day Lions Club - way na njangi for nyoungoh according to yee. For simple pidgin, Charlotte Dipanda only trong becos say e day nyoungoh. Na the first time that way a hear say some Cameroonian star day nyoungoh.
                                                 A no know whether na neck or na idleness but anytime way some person blow peepo dem ko start say na nyoungoh. Dee ting be start na with Rihanna, Jay Z and yee ngah say dem day Illumati. E fit be na true, e fit be na lie but na wheti be njanga yee own inside achu soup? Wo know say mop no get bandary but the bad thing with dee kongossa na say e dee make some pikin dem feel say if you wan blow you mos enter bad njangi. Dee kongossa too dee make some peepo dem feel say u fit sleep for wouna house sotay gas then jos woukop torn star like play. Da wan na fat lie. Make wo jos gree day all dee star dem day nyoungoh. Est-ce que na nyoungoh dee make dem sing fine? Est-ce que na nyoungoh dee gee dem power for stand sing and saka sotay? Make peepo dem shidong quiet. Prince Afu-Akom be dong tok yee ting say when person dong make'am wishpeepo ko start say na mami water. 




Thursday, May 30, 2013

Cameroonian-born boxer wins World Heavyweight title

Cameroonian - born boxer Carlos Takam is the new World Heavyweight Champion. He got the title after an eighth round - KO downing of American Michael Grant last Friday May 24 in France.With this victory, he has increased his KO record to 22 and is widely considered to deserve a shot at a boxer like Amin Mansour. 

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

What makes you an Anglophone or a Francophone?



Since it was announced that Buea would host the reunification celebrations, unity and national identity have suddenly become popular themes in mainstream Cameroonian discourse. In fact, they have become a rhetoric of sorts. During talk shows on TV and radio, experts and laypersons alike spar over the issues passionately. Words galore are peddled as positions and convictions are affirmed. However two of the most recurrent words during these intellectual fights are Anglophone and Francophone.
 As mundane and sociological correct as they may seem, these two words are the headache of policy makers because they often precede and trump the desired feeling of national oneness. They also provide most, if not all, Cameroonians, the Indomitable Lions and mechanical patriotic sentimentality apart, with one of the most unambiguous definitions of self. This begs the answer of what makes Cameroonians feel Anglophone or Francophone? What really constitutes or underlies these mostly parallel identities?
Some would argue that it is mastery and use of one of the constitutionally – backed languages; English  or French. But then it is not uncommon to hear a Francophone Cameroonian with an excellent command of English say,’Les anglos ci eh’, or an Anglophone Cameroonian with an equally good command of French say ,'These Francophones..', in jest though but in an attempt to indicate his/her difference from the other. This means that it is not because Cameroonians speak French or English that they identify themselves as Anglophone or Francophone. So what is it then? What makes Cameroonians consider themselves Anglophone and Francophone? A generic approach to answering this question will surely be accused of gross subjectivity and simplification of a complex issue. So maybe the best option is to try another subjective but personal approach. What makes this Cameroonian writer feel Anglophone?
Now that the question has been asked, I must admit the answer is not easy. And I have come to the sudden realisation that my Anglophoness could be an inheritance, nothing more than the unavoidable outcome of my birth to two Anglophone parents. But then if this question was asked to my Dad and he backtracked as I am doing, he’ll end with my late Grandfather who spent his life on the fringes and unaware of this socio-political divide. You can say he was an Anglophone but more by default. For most Cameroonians being Anglophone or Francophone is a belief so one can’t be an Anglophone or Francophone by default. I’ve hit a brick wall and can no longer hide my head in the sand. So what makes me an Anglophone? Eh eh.....I am finding it hard to start my answer by ‘I am an Anglophone because...’. So let me rephrase. After some amount, just some amount I say, of introspection and retrospection, I THINK I am an Anglophone because GENERALLY SPEAKING my stockpile of historical references and aspirations are different from that of my Francophone brothers and sisters. Simply put, I can see the Reunification as a bad deal and I want better representation. Do my Francophone co-citizens share the same views just enumerated? I think not.
From the highly subjective foregoing, it seems that what makes Cameroonians Anglophone or Francophone is their dissonant repertoire of perceptions about the buildings blocks for national building. Did I add that perception is everything? Or is their Anglophoneness or Francophoneness nothing more than an awareness of their respective non-Francophoneness or Anglophoneness? As I said earlier, this is no easy matter. Anyway instead of trying to force feed Cameroonians, I beg your pardon. Instead of trying to force feed Anglophone and Francophone Cameroonians with a manufactured sense of unity when history and time so allow, our leadership should either convince us that we share common historical references and aspirations or start engineering them before these conjoined identities morph into radical opposites.

Long live the Republic of Cameroon.

Saturday, May 25, 2013

Some Cameroonian footballers heading for lower leagues next season

As the 2012/2013 draws to an end, some Cameroonian footballers will be playing lower league football after the relegation of their various clubs. This is in case they do not leave the clubs. Below is a list of some of such Cameroonian footballers.
For Stephane Mbia,the excitement of the 8.8 million £ move to the Premiership has now given way to the pale prospect of Championship football next season as his club Queens Park Rangers are heading for the second tier of English football next season.
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With just 5 goals in 34 matches, Moukandjo Benjamin's lack of goal - scoring eloquence in front of goal might be the repeated in the second tier of French football next season with his club AS Nancy.




Alo'o Effoulou is the another  Cameroonian at AS Nancy.
 22 matches and just 3 goals.









Basselekin Landry is the third AS Nancy attacker from Cameroon. All season long, he played just a match = 9 minutes. Ligue 2 football next season.





Roland Ndy Assembe is AS Nancy's Cameroonian goalkeeper. One can only imagine how many goals he conceded since his team has been relegated.




25 yr old Cameroonian born atttacker Jean - Christophe Bahebeck who plays for relegated French League 1 side Troyes. 3 goals after 26 games.









George Elokobi who plays with English Championship side Wolverhampton Wanderers will be in League 1 next season; the third tier of English football.









Remember him? Valery Mezague is heading for League 2 - the 4th tier of English football- with his English club Bury F.C. after joining them in February this year.





Joseph Boum who plays defensively for Turkish Super League side Mersin Idman Yurdu might be playing in the lesser league as his club has been relegated.





Midifelder Patrick Ekeng Ekeng and his Ligue 2 side Le Mans will be playing in the third tier of French football next season.









Cameroonian born Sedan midfielder Fabien Tchenkoua will be playing in the third tier of French football next season after his club was relegated from Ligue 2.



Another Cameroonian born Sedan player Louis Marie Rodrique Bongongui will also be in the third tier of French football next season.











Friday, May 24, 2013

Michael Jackson be go 20th May for Bamusso

People dem for town get da own way for enjoy 20th May and people dem for village get da own way. People dem  for Bamusso sub-division, Ndian Division be chop dee 20th May na with Michael Jackson. Wouna take eye chop chrismos. But make a tell wouna say before e wan start, CD be scratch.